I actually have no interesting coming out story to tell. Mostly because my coming out happened in stages and in small steps over time. Most of my extended family has no clue, and my immediate family either knows or doesn’t based on if they’ve been around when I’ve talked about past girlfriends or something. Overall, I haven’t felt a big need to talk directly about this kind of thing because my family considers me so weird for so many reasons this would just add to the pile and not mean much.
Though I am pretty sure that at least one of my aunts thinks I am going through a phase.
I find that I am reluctant to formally come out to anyone, not because I have any shame about what I am, but because I end up getting into odd, intrusive conversations for no good reason. But when it comes up I do usually identify as bisexual unless that day I’ve decided to identify as a lesbian. Why the switch? Because there are many days when I just don’t like men very much, and I’d rather not admit any kind of connection to them in the attraction department. These days usually include those where I have to deal with really sexist dudes, which thankfully isn’t all that often.
I remember in college we used to have discussions about identifying politically as Lesbian or Gay even though one is actually Bisexual. So sometimes I’ll say that politically I’m a lesbian, but emotionally I am bisexual.
I’m also Poly, which most people don’t know about me due to my reluctance to get involved with one partner, let alone multiples.
Actually, that’s what a lot of this reticence comes down to. I do not often enter into romantic relationships (by choice), so there’s not usually much reason for me to reveal my preferences in the matter. Unfortunately, this feeds into the whole heterosexual privilege thing, as many probably assume I am het. And though I am an activist for social justice in many arenas, including LGBT issues, that is not my forefront activism, thus it’s not always apparent.
So, over the course of my life before this, and probably after, I will have many small coming out moments. This post is probably one.