In which I am insane for about 4.5 minutes

When I was a wee one, I loved the New Kids On The Block for a minute.  I was such a dork, though, that I got into them just as everyone else was starting to realize they sucked.  But that’s okay ,because I could enjoy my love for Donnie, Danny, Joey, John and Jordon in peace.  I had all the tapes (well, not that first album, which I hear sucked), and I had two concert videos, and I had posters, but I did not have the dolls.  I had my limits.

And, of course, after a while I stopped thinking they were good and moved on to bigger and better things (Menudo!).  I remember laughing uproariously when the group came through Cincinnati as their career was on the last leg and finding out that they couldn’t even fill up a small club, whereas just a few years before the stadium tickets were sold out in 20 seconds or something.  Fame is fleeting, especially for packaged pop.

A few years ago I almost watched that VH1 reality show with the waning celebrities — The Surreal Life? — because Jordan Knight was on.  But I didn’t care enough to seek the show out and I didn’t have TiVo.  But right around then I heard rumors that some of the boys wanted to have a reunion.  I also heard (I don’t know how I hear these things) that all but John were interested.  He’d been too old for the group in the first place (originally Donnie’s little brother Mark, as in Marky Mark, as in Mark Whalberg, was supposed to be the 5th member, but he took a look at the songs and was like WTF no way, I am a hard ass!  And, as it turns out, he was.  So they recruited John.) and had settled into a normal life as an accountant or real estate agent or something.  He was now really too old for this foolishness.

But I guess they got to him.  Another VH1 show about reuniting bands decided to reunite NKOTB.  I remember hearing about that, too.  But it was a while ago.  It must have worked, or John must be feeling that mortgage crisis, because they reunioned, and now there’s an album maybe?  And also they’ll be on the Today show tomorrow.

How do I know all this?  Well, I was on a social bookmarking site and found a link to someone who has been counting down to this great moment.  When I saw the headline, I laughed, and then I thought “Hmm, nostalgia!  Maybe I should go down there and see them.  I missed out on NKOTB concerts back in the day.  And maybe they are still handsome!  And I always said I would marry Danny someday.  If Katie Holmes can do it, so can I!”

And then I saw the picture.